Wow, I was not expecting that to end. All throughout the story I was curious where this was going. I get that the man was a little creepy and and had probably "Made sure she made it home ok" before but man this was intense. When she hit her head in the market, the tension rose immensely. Also you do a very good job of establishing how close these characters are, Paul and Cheryl. The line "She did not notice and he noticed she did not notice." was to intense. Also you do a good job of describing things. You use a lot of adjectives in places but they aren't complex words, they're more or less simple. And that works well for your story.
One thing I wish was different is that up until we know that the speakers name is Paul, you keep referring to him as the man in the red checkered suit. I get that this is the title and it holds a very significant meaning to the story but I gets overused and losing its meaning. Another thing is I'd really like to know more about this man, Paul. How old is he? How often does he follow Cheryl home? Is this an obession with him? There are a lot of unanswered questions about him that I's like to know. And you could even start the story with a paragraph of Paul almost getting caught or something from his childhood involving his parents.
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